G is for Goofy

In the interest of being honest, I've told you all just how hard motherhood has been for me. I know it isn't like that for everyone, and thank goodness for that. But regardless of where you land on the spectrum, being a parent is hard. Period. It's physically and emotionally draining. It's a huge responsibility and the weight of it is something you constantly tow around. You worry about eating habits and sleeping habits and whether or not they'll turn out all right (since it's your job to make sure they become decent human beings). You get covered in vomit and poop and let them wipe their grimy hands and mouths all over your clean clothes. You take care of them when they are sick, when their feverish cheeks against your shoulder are breaking your heart. Oh my, it is hard.

But the good outweighs the bad. Every. Single. Time. Even if Lucas and I have had a rough day, even if he is sick as a dog, I know that I'll have at least one redemptive moment that will make it all worthwhile. Because not even illness can hold him back from being his goofy self for at least a minute or two. That picture up there was taken while he was having an allergic reaction to penicillin, after being sick for weeks already. Total goofball.

And on normal days, the goofiness happens all the time. It's one of my favorite things about being a parent. I get to play and be silly and it just makes the stress melt away. His goofiness makes me be goofy. I dance and make funny noises and crazy faces. I play pretend. I sing to Elvis and Chuck Barry and Johnny Cash. I chase him around and tickle him. I pop out from behind furniture waving my arms like a lunatic. It makes him laugh and, boy I'll tell you, his laugh could be the only sound I heard for the rest of my life and that would be okay.

My life outside of playtime with him is, for the most part, a lot of bills and serious responsibilities and housekeeping. That ability to let loose with him is absolutely priceless. It's what keeps me going every day. Getting down and goofy with my baby.

Is there anything better?